Unexpected Turnaround

For a while today was the worst day I've had in a while. But that while was like the dark filling in an Oreo of Good(tm). That's probably the least logical metaphor I've ever written.

After the usual surfing after waking up, I watched most of this inspiring lecture. I'd seen the beginning before, but not the bulk of the presentation which is incredibly rich with passion. While I was about 20 minutes from the end I got an unexpected call from Draco. His had just arrived at the local airport, back from GenCon Indy. He stopped by, we went to Dennys and had a good couple hours hanging out, waiting for Reagan to get off work. Among other things, we talked about the aforementioned lecture and how we each relate to the world at large. Diners seem to be a good place for me when it comes to talking out big thoughts.

Back home I contacted a couple people I hope to see come fall, and then somehow slipped into a really dark funk for several hours. Reagan, as usual, helped me out of it and convinced me to go to bed, at least for a few hours, instead of staying up all night before visiting a doctor tomorrow.

I was in bed a few minutes ago. Since the serious sleepiness hadn't hit me yet, I opted to ponder over some of those larger thoughts that have been nagging at me, specifically what my dreams are. Often I feel torn, as though I'm serving two masters as I try to pursue both writing and art. Writing can be a tough field to break into, and visual art is a new language to me that I haven't yet mastered. I thought over how I want those two to intersect, and what form I want my work to take. In several minutes of pondering in the dark I started to visualize where I want to "end up", what my checkpoint is.

Something I know I need to work on is the speed in which I translate my words into pictures. I'll never ever ever be able to draw as fast as I write, in any quality. Ideas will always outpace production, but I want to do what I can to close that gap. I came to the conclusion tonight that I need to imagine an ideal workflow and work towards achieving it.

That's still in the planning stages, but I was inspired to restructure my days, both to maximize my own usefulness and adapt my self-challenge ideas to my current reality of not working out. The New Plan's larger structure is to draw early in the day, and start that practice by sketching something, just one thing, before getting out of bed. Besides liking any idea that would facilitate buying a new sketchbook, it has the potential to capture buts of dreams and fuzzy early morning thoughts. I want to tell myself that exercising my imagination is more important than checking email.

Draw before internet, write (develop ideas) after dinner, read before bed. Posting happens sometime in the reading phase. It's enough of an enjoyable habit that I don't need a specific mention of it in my meta-schedule.

I'm excited about this prospective new way of doing things. I think I've written down enough to keep me relaxed enough about new epiphanies to still fall asleep.